My husband encouraged me to start this blog to give me an outlet other than posting wacky stuff on my FB page 🙂
He hates FB; thinks it will be Big Brother (if not already) and wants me reined in from it a bit. I liked the idea because here was a way to change how my site looks whenever I get the itch, write more than one paragraph on a post, and I would read posts that had more content then “Just washed my dishes” with 30 comments on dishes, most of which were “Gr8!” ; “Suks”; “Come and do mine?”; “Wow, I just got a whole new set!”; “I’m comin over and U can make me some food”; and of course the inevitable change in conversation to “I think I just saw a UFO”…..
So my new slogan is “FB: the cliff notes to the cliff note of pure inanity.”
So Brent thought I was starting a poetry blog. Then I got my first “follower” after some brilliant pieces (my favorite being “Ode to Saggy Baggy Pants”) and THE PRESSURE suddenly hit me. I freaked out, ran to him and said, “Disaster! I have a FOLLOWER”! What am I to do?
He looked up with his “now listen closely, squirrel” look and said (rather pedantically), “Well, you are going to have to post on a regular basis. People follow blogs that post frequently. Do you have enough poems to keep at it? “
Me, stubbing my toe over and over on the floor, “Wee–lll, I have over 60 you know, so I could spread them out while I make more…..BUT guess what? I don’t want this to be JUST a poetry site! I want to be eclectic! I want to be MEEEE!!”
I spun around for emphasis. I stopped and peeked at him. A vortex was forming from his eye rolling. Then, several long sighs. “Lori, blogs aren’t like FB posts. Bloggers follow other bloggers for the theme that they have. Because they don’t know YOUUU. So if you want humor, do humor. If you want poetry, do poetry. But you wont be any success if you just do YOU. Some people will like some of your posts, but no one will like coming to your site never knowing what you’re going to write about. Not trying to hurt your feelings, that’s just the way it is. That’s why I suggested blogging in the first place….for your POEMS.”
I was a little miffed. “But YOU like not ever knowing what YOU are going to get…” Arms crossed. I was performing a Golden Globe Award winner here. He sighed again. I sighed. Yes, there was a down point to that statement.
My husband married me for 2 reasons: I had a 2 second period of insane cuteness and he never loses. I broke up with him 5 years before we starting dating again, and the whole time he was determined that he would Get The Girl. Well, getting the girl and living with the girl were two different worlds entirely. As he discovered.
Brent is the Pole and I am the Squirrel. Sometimes the squirrel pees on the pole. But more often the squirrel just runs up and down and around the pole with no real purpose. The Pole is the Pole, it knows that it is meant to Hold Up Something. But mostly the Pole knows that its main job is to be there for the squirrel to hug. Pathetic. Profound. Me.
Bless all the Poles out there. You may be a little hard to move and a little boring and you may play computer games WAY too much, and you may want to buy every new electronic object on the planet and…..oh, back to the story, sorry, “Im squirreling”. You get the idea.
So, stubborn, I have struck out on my own, writing whatever the wind whispers through my ears. Or whatever spark comes off my neurons. And, inevitably, I start thinking, “AHHH, what if this topic offends someone!” Because I am finding that eclectic breeds eclectic. But, in a world of “themes”, perhaps not knowing what you are going to get: humor–poems–“melodrama”– Christianity—songs (sung A-Capella on my kids’ “Rock Band” microphone 🙂 ) is not such a bad choice after all. Time will tell whether a slightly pathetic “Jack-of-some-trades” is enough for all the “Masters of One”.
So if I lost all FOLLOWERS would I still have a blog? And the true blog-addicted answer is: Of course! But I will hate Brent’s smug I-told-you-so….