I wrote this because, like any middle aged person, I have forgotten what it is like to be young and a slave to your hormones. And dress is your outer skin to the world. Men want women, women want money, so the strange fashions continue so that this never ending cycle will produce the next generation. While I understand this, I do believe that fashion in the 80’s wasn’t quite this, er, unattractive, and I rag my son constantly over his “Im a penguin with a load in his pants” walk. Hope you enjoy my poke at the young and fashionably undressed and……
PULL YOUR PANTS UP!
Who could think that fashion would sink
to wearing pants under your bum.
This drives most rational dressers to drink;
while this is quite “swag “ to some.
Teens these days with butt showing ways
are immune to eye rolling stares.
Don’t they know that the low pant craze
is not something people want them to share?
As usual they think that their “shit don’t stink”
otherwise they simply don’t care.
I cant imagine why holding up their pants
does not drive them insane!
If they knew how silly the wiggle dance
looked, Im sure they would refrain.
And who wants to see their underwear
that often is nothing to brag about?
I certainly have no desire to “see down there”;
some bums are simply not meant to hang out.
I have threatened to lower my own pants in protest
(although the poor souls in my rear view
would not appreciate my mid-life jest)
just to offend this generation’s teenage crew.
But as my butt is saggy, dimpled and fat,
I shall refrain from embarrassing you.
Some day their child’s teenage craze
will make teens today scream and shout.
Until then, we smarter persons must bend
to suffering this embarrassing craze out.
Ok, Ok, this may be “quirky” but it is really a cry for help from a mom who is sick of seeing her son’s ass hanging out of his pants. Now, as his proud progenitor, I do have to say that the little bubble is as cute now as it was at the tender age of 2, but its been many years since he was Licensed to Moon. I am Just Not Impressed with the Low Riders. Why does anyone think this is a decent way to deliver your image? Looking (and walking) like you have a huge load in your pants is an enviable state? Although, now that I have Vomited up My Distaste and Can Think Clearly, emulating the walk of a penguin is a free form of entertainment, so perhaps I should just Grin, take lots of Pics for Future Blackmailing Opportunities and Enjoy….