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“Ur-ine” luck that my husband is your owner

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This is Taffy (aka Mr Fuzzypants). His hair is so long he has to be kept shaved.  We shave him like a little lion except the tuft of his tail, his ruff and his legs. 

Doors and cats are a bit of a problem.  That’s because cats are sneaky and love small spaces.  And closets are small spaces.  Even the walk-in kind, which I have in the bedrooms.  I think walk-ins are even more attractive to cats.  There like cat size rooms.  Closets are notorious for doors.  Do you see where we are getting here?

My kids close their closet doors….sometimes.  Unfortunately they never look for cats.  When one has 4 cats, sometimes they get missed.  After all, they’re pretty easy to lose.

Two days ago Jenyn ran downstairs late in the afternoon yelling, “Mom, Taffy has been locked in my closet!”

“Ahh….ok.”

“No, mom, you don’t understand.  I don’t know how long he has been there!”

“Ahh…ok.  He knows where the food is.”  Boy is that the truth.  He is a food vacuum.

Mental-Click-From-Sudden-Turn-On-Of Spidy-Sense.

  “Jenyn, you better check the closet really well if he has been in there for some time. He may have left a present in there.  When did you last go in there?”

Silence.  My daughter can (and sometimes does) wear the same outfit all weekend.  And unless I yell and scream, dirty clothes do NOT go in the closet.  So it could be days before the closet is opened if she shut it.  God forbid we have an emergency at night.  She will die trying to pick her way across the wasteland of her floor.  So as the silence stretched, I decided that it meant a loooonnnggg time.

“Oh, Brent!”  My husband can be found in two spots.  In front of his computer fighting the minions of evil on Star Wars MMO in the computer room next to Jenyn’s bedroom, or glazed out watching something on the DVR on the couch in the great room.  A quick glance on the couch left me one other option.

“WHAT!”  Brent is Mr Hide when bugged while playing Star Wars.

“I need a cat pee check in Jenyn’s room!”  Litter Check, Aisle Eight.

Stompy footsteps.  Then, “I think he just hit the bag. I’ll bring it down.”

“Are you SURE it was just the bag?”  There are two things that get my immediate freak out attention.  A load of mess and the threat of cat pee.

Cat pee and I have a long adversarial history.  A LOOONNNGG history.  Over twenty years.  And expensive.  To the tune of around 20,000.

Yes, THREE ZEROS.

One cat pee on a rug in a multi-cat household can mean disaster.  I had to replace 75% the rugs in my last house with non-carpet flooring due to multiple extensive cat pee issues.  I had a cat with neurosis who had to be put down.  I wanted him put down early.  My husband decided to spend our son’s first year of college savings before giving in.  So I get a little nuts over it.  (See The Cats in my Flat )

“Yes, just the bag.”  Whew.  I nag my daughter a little about not closing the closet.

This morning I wake her up.  The closet door was closed. Sigh.  I open it, and a noxious wave of cat pee blows my hair back.  I turn into the Wicked Witch of… well, let’s say all four.  “WHAAAAAATT!!!!  J-E-N-Y-N!!!!!”

Jenyn raises her head.  “Cousin It” is alive and well.  “Huh….”.

“THERE IS CAT PEE IN YOUR CLOSET!!!!  YOU LIED TO ME!!!”

Stomp.  Stomp. Stomp.  Bang.  Stomp. Stomp. Stomp. Bang.

“Brent.”  A low growl in my bedroom.  I figure I would start in the low octave.

“Uhng.”

“Wake up.”

“Ok.”

“There is cat pee in Jenyn’s closet.  You didn’t check. Now it is all over her clothes on the floor.  It is YOUR responsibility to get up NOW and clean it up.”

I did get up into the higher octaves.  Needless to say, Brent did clean up the clothes and start the vinegar soak.  Now I have days of vinegar-wet vac-vinegar-wet vacing in front of me.  Cat pee rapidly soaks into the carpet pad and that is just heck to remove.  The ammonia has to be neutralized and the cheapest way to do that is to dump lots of vinegar on it.  Eventually they will neutralize as the vinegar dries.  But you have to be aggressive or just start ripping up carpet.  And I am too poor to rip up anything at the moment…other then people who are idiots in my household.

Pictures: powerpointforpreachers.blogspot.com

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One comment on ““Ur-ine” luck that my husband is your owner

  1. One of the many reasons I abandoned all thoughts of cat ownership

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