I have a runny nose.
Not just your run of the mill, wipe now and then runny nose. No, I have a full flowing dripping faucet. I suspect RSV, as I was exposed last week to it. And RSV is the mother of all runny noses. I also feel 100% of the time like I am on the verge of sneezing. You know that pre-sneeze face, the one where the sneezer-wanna-be looks to be in severe pain? Yup, me.
I and my Monsoonic runny nose and my pre-sneezy face had to go out. Most people manage just fine in public with a runny nose. I was less fortunate.
Checker: Hello, is this all you are needing?
Me: [SNIFF, SNIFF, eyes watering, sneezy face] Yub
Checker: Wow you saved 50% on this item. How cute! How would you like to pay for it?
Me: Wib [sniff] caz [sniff, sniff, sniff, SNIFF]
Uh, oh, my sniffing was out of control and I felt a drop hovering on the edge of my nostril. I swiped my pocket for a tissue, but too late. I watched horrified as a big drop fell onto the counter. I flicked a desperate look at the lady, realized she saw the event, and with total abandonment of my senses, swiped my nose then wiped it up with the tissue I found in my pocket. Nose presented another offering. I begin to frantically sniff, sounding like an excited puppy. And set off a sneeze right into her face that I just couldn’t catch in time. I am a very loud sneezer. Loud laugh, loud sneeze, loud me.
No more conversation. What is there to say? I was a bit mortified as I left and determined to hide out until my nose got under control. But it seemed to just get worse. So I resorted to the tried and uncomfortable but true:
The Nose Plug
A rolled up tissue stuffed into each side to hold it all in. Of course one cannot breathe this way, but desperate times call for desperate action.
Unfortunately my son brought home his two best friends and bounded into the house before I could unplug.
Then grins and snickers
I have a name for them that starts with a “W”, but I am in polite company. Anyway, the tissue didn’t stay because I kept sneezing it out.
Last night I decided on some generic Benadryl to dry me up. And not only did it dry me up for the night, it put me into a nice coma and I slept for 12 hours.
Today the drip was a little more controlled until I decided to tackle the cat hair on my unused desk. My desk is clean and the nose plugs are firmly back into position. At least until the next sneeze…..
Ok, pulling deep for gratitude: At Least I Have Tissues….