10 Comments

Tissue Plugs

I have a runny nose.

Not just your run of the mill, wipe now and then runny nose.  No, I have a full flowing dripping faucet.  I suspect RSV, as I was exposed last week to it.  And RSV is the mother of all runny noses.  I also feel 100% of the time like  I am on the verge of sneezing.  You know that pre-sneeze face, the one where the sneezer-wanna-be looks to be in severe pain?  Yup, me.

I and my Monsoonic runny nose and my pre-sneezy face had to go out.  Most people manage just fine in public with a runny nose.  I was less fortunate.

Checker: Hello, is  this all you are needing?

Me: [SNIFF, SNIFF, eyes watering, sneezy face] Yub

Checker:  Wow you saved 50% on this item. How cute!  How would you like to pay for it?

Me: Wib [sniff] caz  [sniff, sniff, sniff, SNIFF]

Uh, oh, my sniffing was out of control and I felt a drop hovering on the edge of my nostril.  I swiped my pocket for a tissue, but too late.  I watched horrified as a big drop fell onto the counter.  I flicked a desperate look at the lady, realized she saw the event, and with total abandonment of my senses, swiped my nose then wiped it up with the tissue I found in my pocket.  Nose presented another offering.  I begin to frantically sniff, sounding like an excited puppy.  And set off  a sneeze right into her face that I just couldn’t catch in time.  I am a very loud sneezer.  Loud laugh, loud sneeze, loud me.

No more conversation.  What is there to say?  I was a bit mortified as I left and determined to hide out until my nose got under control.  But it seemed to just get worse.  So  I resorted to the tried and uncomfortable but true:

The Nose Plug

Tissues in nose

A rolled up tissue stuffed into each side to hold it all in.  Of course one cannot breathe this way, but desperate times call for desperate action.

Unfortunately my son brought home his two best friends and bounded into the house before I could unplug.

Silence

Then grins and snickers

I have a name for them that starts with a “W”, but I am in polite company.  Anyway, the tissue didn’t stay because I kept sneezing it out.

Last night  I decided on some generic Benadryl to dry me up.  And not only did it dry me up for the night, it put me into a nice coma and I slept for 12 hours.

Today the drip was a little more controlled until I decided to tackle the cat hair on my unused desk.  My desk is clean and the nose plugs are firmly back into position.  At least until the next sneeze…..

Ok, pulling deep for gratitude: At Least  I Have Tissues….

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10 comments on “Tissue Plugs

  1. I laughed so hard reading this I threw my back out. Hope you’re satisfied 😀
    Sounds to me like a good dose of Afrin might be in order here. Yes, I know it has a bad rep for being “addictive,” but desperate situations call for desperate measures.

    And I LOVE the picture!!! Really, from a BC site? Amazing.

    Hope your gushing nose dries up soon, and that you feel better, and that you remember NOT to clean up cat hair while your nose is already activated! Luv U!

    • Misery can be acutely funny. Yes, I don’t get that pic either, but hey I loved it anyway. The other is my nose all trussed up and tucked in for the night. Afrin would just make me sneeze more, and I needed to dry up, not unstuff. And more unstuffy and I would be breathing air from China. Luv you back and I am glad you had a good howl over it.

      • Yeah, that pic with the nasal tampons almost made me puke laughing. That’s what you should do, go over to ENT and beg a few nasal tampons (there are such things, for putting pressure on intranasal arterial bleeds and postop). But don’t you have the whole sleep apnea saga? How does this rhinorrhea overload impinge upon that part of your life?

        • OMG. You are such a doctor, you ferreted out what I did NOT say. Yes, I am choking at night. Try sneezing into CPAP, it comes out your mouth and feels like your lungs exploded. Dis-gusting. Benedryl is truly my friend.

        • Oh, I have used the nose tampons with epi with severe (I mean gushing) epistaxis on HD. Heparin is not fun when paired with a nosebleed. The pic is actually rolled high quality TP–the quilted kind. Doesn’t stick to ones mucus membranes. The cheap stuff does. I know my nose plugs. LOL

  2. Hey, the plugs are OK… it looks better than two dill pickle slices, stuffed cabbage, mini carrots, sausages (didn’t see that one coming, did ya?), or slim jims coming out your nostrils.

    • Or tampons…don’t think I didn’t consider it. 🙂

      • Actually, I did too, but decided not to “color” the post

        • 🙂 There are nasal tampons used in ER’s for severe epistaxis episodes. We carry them in our ER cart at work as I use large doses of heparin to prevent circuit clotting while our kids are on their dialysis treatments. Yes, I have used them before on severe gushing nosebleeds. One soaks epinephrine on them and shoves them up the poor sufferer’s nose. As you can see in my picture, mine are home made sans epi!

  3. As a man who has tissue wedged firmly in my nostrils most days I’m in full sympathy with you even though you did paint a very funny picture. That’s one shop I’d never be able to go into again.
    xxx Huge Hugs xxx

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