How to SNAG a man….

I admit it.  I have an awful sense of humor.  I decided to create a Top Ten for SNAGging a Man.  If you are easily offended please skip this one!  I shall now go back “into my corner”….

10. Don’t be a nag
9. Exercise fiendishly, no matter how much you want to drag
8. Bat your eyes and pretend interest when he starts to brag
7. Get out on that racetrack and dont lag!
6.  Dont be a rag….
5.  Paint the barn if you look a hag….
4.  Learn to laugh when he calls you “his old bag“….
3.  Get on your WOMAN and give that booty a wag!
2.  Get a boob job if they sag…..
1.  Invest in shirts that say  “Wanted: 100% MAN…..0% FAG!
Picture: chron.com

6 comments on “How to SNAG a man….

  1. Hi my name’s Vlad and I don’t wanna brag but I’ve got a Jag and a bagful of swag so do you wanna AaaTCHooo….

  2. Intriguing: “Paint the barn if you look like a hag” That would not hurt, if one were a hag. A fresh coat of paint should brighten up everyone around the old barn, including she who may be called “the old barn.” Of course, there are fresh coats of paint that cannot cure what some “old barns” lack…like the now deceased Tammy Faye Bakker, who has likely gone to Paint Purgatory.

    Not sure I understand #3, and maybe that is a good thing. But, ethically available woman, who does not resemble an old barn, who wears the shirt described in #1…should be given directions to my house. 🙂

    • Well, put your address on your blog with a full size picture with what you are looking for and I am sure that “if you show it, they will come”. You have a load of wonderful qualities, just underadvertized! If nothing else, the situations it will put you in would be great material for Mr and Mrs Boring.

      • Unfortunately for me, some of my handsomeness has slid off over the guardrail these past few years- I am no longer Clark Gable. For Mr and Mrs Boring, I will never run out of material, as long as I remember my…no, i cannot give it away. But thank you for the compliment. I do think you have great possibilities yourself in the Hall of Impressive People on Online. Take care and enjoy the verbal adventures.

  3. Mom, what did I just read?

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